what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
