he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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