"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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