No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
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Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
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Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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