some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize