Say something about gay babies.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
