I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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