I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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