You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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