Duck Duck Cougar?
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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