party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
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