I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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