I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
