In the future we'll all be gay
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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