should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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