I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
