We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Randomize