We won't sleep together?
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
