What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
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Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
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The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
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