In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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