i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
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