No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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