You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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