No, you can still breathe under the balls.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
