her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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