dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
