He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize