Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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