Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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