how can u be prego again
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Randomize
