Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
