Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
