you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
