haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
