All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
