So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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