just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Randomize
