dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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