READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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