Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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