Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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