Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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