Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
My liver just had a heart attack.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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