I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize