You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
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