i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Randomize
