i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize