u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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