I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize