Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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