You just made me feel so damn special
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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